There are many articles related to Narcissism, some written by professionals in the field, others more by victims called “survivors of the Narcissist”, and some by people who, having been the perpetrators themselves, have changed their lifestyle by going to specialized centers that They have given the instruments to defeat themselves.
However, if we take a tour of the articles published in various media, the vast majority of them focus on Narcissism within the relationship, leaving aside other fields in which the Narcissist extends his domain.
The personality of the true Narcissist is almost imperceptible to people: sometimes people with similar, selfish, self-paid, manipulative characteristics are described as such, but we can openly identify those phases of their personality, we are not really facing a true narcissist.
The real Narcissist does not show himself as such, he is soft, he is subtle, in fine ways, he is not violent, he is a charming person who seduces with his gift of people to those around him.
That enchanting charm, be it a man or a woman, a couple, a boss or co-worker, a friend or a relative, we do not realize until we end up entangled in the web that subtly wove to catch us.
That friendship that you lost when you first refused to support one of their manipulative games and that isolated you socially; that authority in your work for which you lost your job when you demanded recognition of your work and that discredited you before your colleagues and blocked your access to another company; that family that makes you the center of gossip among your own relatives; That couple that mistreated you for years and that before others is your victim, that is the real Narcissist.
The violence of which the Narcissist makes you an object is not physical, it goes way beyond that, it is more harmful, it attacks your self-esteem, it disqualifies you before everyone, it victimizes itself and it achieves that those around it believe it, since inside of his abilities is precisely the subtlety, the charm, he only shows himself as he is before his object of control, once he loses this, his survival is in the destruction of himself before others.
The charm of the Narcissist is the song of the sirens, an almost extra-sensory perception is required to avoid crashing against the cliff of reality.